How to Choose a Sex Offender Counselor/Treatment Provider

This is one of the more important decisions you will have to make when starting sex offender counseling.  As far as I know, no matter where you are in the United States, you are able to choose your own counselor.  Of course, it's not that simple.  Let's take things step by step and walk through some considerations.

So you just met your PO who says you need to attend sex offender counseling within 7 days or you'll be in violation.  Probation may have a list of approved providers - ask for it.  Ask your PO if he has a recommendation.  At my probation office in Middlesex County, they preferred providers who are accredited through MCSOM (Massachusetts Coalition for Sex Offender Management) or MASOC (Massachusetts Adolescent Sex Offender Coalition), the latter focusing on juvenile offenders.  In the end, make certain your PO approves your choice.  For most, you'll be looking to get into a group rather than one-on-one.  It's cheaper and in my opinion the better option when starting counseling since you are with others in the same boat and the dynamic is in many ways invaluable and can't be replicated in individual counseling.  Individual counseling with the right provider can be just as productive and you will be able to spend more time on your specific issues but the majority of offenders attend group counseling (more on individual vs. group counseling in another post).

Now you have some names and numbers, start calling.  I'd begin with the ones your PO recommends while also taking into consideration their location and your access to reliable transportation.  Some of the questions you should ask each provider is:

• What is your approach to counseling (cognitive behavioral, psychoanalytic, humanistic, combination, etc...)
• How would you describe the counselors role with the group (do they facilitate the group or conduct it with a lot of oversight)
• How would you describe the current group of participants (ex-cons, probationers, voluntary, participants age range and types of offenses, etc...)
• What exactly do you report to probation?  Do you allow probation officers/law enforcement to sit in on sessions?
• What is the policy toward new group members?  For instance, do I have to tell my story the first day or do I have a few weeks before I have to go in depth with my story? 
• Can I sit in one night and see if the group is the right one for me? (your trying out a group should satisfy probation's requirement for attending sex offender counseling...as always check with your PO)
• Can I have a copy of your waiver
• How much per session?

You should ask other questions pertinent to your situation such as whether they accept insurance, the  absentee policy,

If possible, and I highly recommend this, is to sit in on a session.  Try out a few groups to compare and contrast.  You'll probably be nervous and scared walking in and sitting with a bunch of strangers talking about sex offending or their current woes, but you'll get used to it.

The counselor sets the tone for the group so try to be sure he isn't too soft (things can spiral out of control if they don't have control-I've seen it happen) or unnecessarily a bully (unreasonably threatening people to call their PO).  With some counselors, they know and need to turn the screws and pressure a sex offender on parole/probation from time to time to get progress or a breakthrough but you want to avoid ones who  abuse that power.  Ideally, the counselor is experienced and knows when to be relaxed and when to really push an individual or the group to get progress.

Also, pay attention to what is going on between participants and how people relate to one another.  Is the group supportive? Adversarial? Do group members allow a lot of denial to go unaddressed?  Are participants there to really change some things or are grudgingly there just to comply with probation?  To be realistic, you can expect a little bit of all of that in many members and groups.  However, you don't want any one characteristic to dominate.

After you've made your choice, chat it up with others in the group to get a sense of how they feel about the group and the counselor.  You'll know soon enough if that situation is right for you.  If not, don't hesitate to try out another provider though its better to decide this at an early stage to avoid starting from scratch all over again with another group.

Forget the Pity Party: This Is What Is Possible

Just a quick post to link you to MonsterMart, a blog about a Level 3 registered sex offender living in Washington State.  I don't really enjoy using the words "inspiring" or "hopeful" very much at all, but what he was able to accomplish simply kicks ass.

Less Than 6 Months of Probation Left: Some Things You Should Be Doing

As I enter the last months of my 10 years on probation, I thought it important to mention some of the things you should do to ensure a smooth, trouble free transition away from any type of supervision. A little bit of planning and proactivity can save you from trouble and receiving extra time on probation.

Recently, I spoke with an attorney in Boston who said an all too common reason a probationer is not released from probation is because he hasn't paid money owed.  This debt may include probation supervision fees, court fees, DNA fees, vicitim restitution, paying for victim counseling, etc...  You name it.  Whatever probation believe you owe, you owe.  Come your release day, if you owe money you won't be set free from probation until it's all paid off.  Even if you think you aren't in arrears, ask the probation office to do an audit on your account around 6 months before release to give you time to pay up, perform community service in lieu of cash payments, or dispute charges if need be.

Another suggestion is to scour your probation contract for what conditions you are required to complete or satisfy.  Besides paying many fees, you could be required to "complete" sex offender therapy, Alcoholics Anonymous, Anger Management, and other programs.  Be sure to know what "completing" means to the probation department.  Probation (and the courts) idea of of having completed a program may not be the same as what the particular program considers to be "completed" or "graduated".  In fact, these days here in Middlesex County a sex offender on probation who graduated from all phases of treatment cannot simply stop going to treatment.  One has to be in "maintenance" treatment while on probation.  Furthermore, what maintenance treatment is varies between providers.  Unfortunately, not much is standardized in the treatment provider community.  It wouldn't hurt to go over your probation contract with your probation officer so you are both on the same page.

And if you think you can and/or should stop attending treatment after you are released from probation, you might want to reconsider.  For example, if at any point in the future you plan on appealing your dangerousness level to the Sex Offender Registry Board (SORB), it behooves you to continue maintenance treatment after release from any supervision. Significant gaps of time where your well being and behavior cannot be accounted for could work against you since the SORB has no recent information or testimonials from treatment providers to take into account.  At the same time, seeing a therapist several times a year might be good insurance and good for you in the event you encounter problems or if you know you function and live better under a therapists supervision.

YMCAs begin to screen for sex offenders

This is an issue that came up in the beginning of January I wanted to comment on.
Here's the article:  YMCAs begin to screen for sex offenders
I am not a YMCA member, but this banning business is frustrating and crazy, in my opinion.

So the YMCA implemented this policy after a girls basketball coach, who was not a convicted sex offender when he was hired or when coaching, plead guilty to various sex offenses with young girls. I suppose the Y feels they have to do something showing they are "protecting" members, especially since it's less of a traditional gym and more of a mixed adult/kids place, but chalk this up as another reactive policy to sex offenders.

The Y is instituting a policy that doesn't directly address how they could have let a coach with a clean record come in and coach young girls he ended up offending against.  If the Y needs to find sex offenders among their members and staff, the only way to be sure is to have staff (this offender could be considered staff) and members undergo a thorough evaluation including personality testing, penile plethysmography, the female equivalent to a penile plethysmograph, and attentional evaluation to deviant stimuli.  Just ranting but what the hell...

A Little More About Prison Classification and Treatment

As I mentioned, do your research and gather enough information as you can about where you might want to go.  Granted, the classification board may already have other ideas but you should at least make a case for yourself.  Being realistic (i.e. not requesting to go straight to a minimum security facility if you have to serve 5 years) and being serious about treatment, getting your life back together/turned around, etc... all helps.

What I wanted to talk about further was the conundrum facing inmates who do not want to engage in treatment.  For some, they refuse to admit their offenses.  For others, they don't want to put themselves out there as a sex offender or participate in any type of treatment, maybe because he has a long sentence and wants to do most of it not labeled as a sex offender.  However, inmates who plan on appealing their convictions can be advised by their attorneys to not engage in treatment for any sort of admission could jeopardize the appeal.  Since treatment requires you admitting to the actions behind your conviction, there lies the rub.

By not participating in treatment, you could be seen as being in denial and more dangerous.  You could be sanctioned in various ways: not being allowed to work, unable to transfer to a better or lower security facility, being transferred to a "worse" facility, or even involuntarily civilly committed as a sexually dangerous person.  In my case and in part to get inmates to participate in sex offender treatment, state inmates were sent to Texas and told if we didn't engage in and complete Phase 1 of treatment offered at the county jail, we would not be considered eligible to return to Massachusetts.  Prison, much of it about incentives for certain behavior,  just works that way.

What I am trying to say is the prison system will essentially compel and bully you to comply. Appealing your conviction makes no difference to the people in charge and it won't immunize you from sanctions you may receive.  If you believe it's worth it and you have the promise of a great appeal then the hardship you will encounter may be worth it.  Whether you choose to engage in treatment or not, it's a calculated risk where at some point you may have to cut your losses and consider the long term consequences.

Busted

No, your life isn't over though some of you might feel like doing something drastic.  Don't.  Maybe you did it; maybe you didn't; maybe you've done more.  Whatever it is you've been accused of doing, this is a scary, confusing, emotional time to say the least.  Depending on many factors-what you have been accused of doing, family situation, where you live, your work, your friends, you involvement in the community- all of this factors into how things may go for you after you've been arrested or brought in front of a judge.

If you are fortunate, you'll be released on bail (possibly with a GPS monitor) or be under house arrest (A word about house arrest: it's much better than being in jail, but it's very stressful, especially if you live with loved ones.  I thought it would be more enjoyable than it was, but I couldn't eat very much and was somewhat miserable stuck mostly in my room.  Every time I looked at my family I felt like crap; my situation coloring almost every waking moment with the knowledge no matter what I was going to go to prison.).  Jail is, of course, the worst.  I was 20 when I spent 7 days in jail before being granted house arrest.  Oddly, I never felt more hungry before and being 5'11'' and 145 from the suburbs I didn't exactly feel safe.  And this is how naive I was: someone said there was a swimming pool on the roof of the jail we were able to use at night and I believed him!  Yikes...  I learned quickly after that.  Anyway, basic things such as communicating with your attorney and family from jail is cumbersome, but at least you are able to receive your jail time as time served off your sentence if you are given more.

Speaking of attorneys: do your best to find an attorney experienced with defending sex offenders and prepare to plunk down some good money for him.  You don't need to get the most expensive one, but don't go cheap when it comes to this attorney-it makes a big difference.  I had a court appointed attorney who didn't do as thorough a job as he should have.

Lastly, and briefly since I will write about this more in the future, you should start planning for your time in prison or on probation while you are (hopefully) still out and regardless of what you believe the outcome of your case to be.  The closest representation I've seen of how prison can be is the TV program "LockUp" on MSNBC.  It is TV and people have a camera on them so keep that in mind.  However, the show can give you a good idea of the milieu and stresses of prison, how it operates, and the tough choices you may have to make on a daily basis.

Additionally, you should understand how you will be classified and what facilities have sex offender treatment in your state and run it by your attorney.  It may make a difference if/when you go in front of the classification board asking for a certain facilities and backing up your request with rationale toward rehabilitation which probably includes treatment, education, work, and family considerations.  But have a plan on what you should accomplish before you are up for parole or released.  Your progress, or lack thereof, informs probation and the sex offender registry board on how "dangerous" you may be and if you are taking your offense and treatment seriously.

With probation, you need to understand all of the terms and conditions and stick to them and, as I mentioned before in the blog, do your job.  Be sure to understand what you are required to achieve treatment-wise and evaluate the program you enter to make sure you are able to satisfy probation's requirements by "completing" treatment at some level so you can successfully get off probation and show the sex offender registry board your progress if you choose to try and get reclassified to a lower risk level.